A True Role Model

"I fear failure and being less than I can be." We sat on the striped green couch as a movie played out on the screen. Her round face radiated happiness. "It's like if I don't finish or at least try I'm letting my whole life up to this point down." Her words sang in my head. We doused our toes in nail polish remover, watched a cheesy movie, ate popcorn, and tried to stop the next day from coming. Our dad had left and we were left alone to hang out before Courtney had to go back to North Carolina. This was the worst part; the bittersweet evening. It was like we knew what was coming but we couldn't stop it; tomorrow would come and she would catch a plane up to Kernersville.
I had so much fun, though my brother wasn't here to enjoy it. Courtney and Casey had always had a sibling rivalry. "We had a system worked out where he always messed up and I always did the right thing." It wasn't always easy having to take care of a little brother like a child, but Courtney seemed to get through it. She had perseverance. And she still looks out for me. Thinking back, I can't remember a time when she didn't love me. Ever.
"So when are you coming back?" I asked, already knowing the answer. I shifted on the couch uncomfortably in my pajamas. Her feet moved across the carpet, sore and calloused from dancing.
"Christmas time, every six months I come back to SD. I'm going to miss you so much Bean," she said as she slathered on another layer of orange nail polish like she was frosting a cake, not bothering to look up from her work. Her brown hair floated down, glowing from the dim lights inside our house. I sighed, then looked up to the T.V screen, seeing Zac Efron. Oh Zac, I said, why can't she stay longer? Please don't make it end. I mused, then looked over to see my sister's smiling face.
She was always so brave, being the first one in my immediate family to go to college, or becoming something other than a small town waitress, or even just being there for me when I needed it. Courtney truly has a good life; being smart, being loved for who you are, not relying on alcohol or drugs to have an awesome day, and most importantly, being herself. I looked up from my sister's loving gaze to the movie. The credits rolled like slow like a snail, prolonging the sadness, a cue for the night to end. My sister leaned down and hugged me, signaling bedtime. She stood about my height, 5’5 over me, her short brown hair falling past her eyes. They sparkled blue under her glasses, a telltale sign of a Van Arsdale. She hugged tighter, and I didn’t feel like letting go. I hugged back, feeling warm like the hot cocoa from our mugs. This is who I should be like, I thought. We finished our hug, then I dashed up the creaky stairs and into the dark.